My hidden struggle

Gosh, I was really hoping to keep this blog as a freshy, friendly, fun, girly, and glittery blog. I wanted to showcase my passion and talents of beauty, fashion, recipes, etc but for one reason or another it has turned into something much different. I am a Christian. I am not perfect but I love the Lord and God is perfecting me little by little. God revealed some changes that I need to make and well I was hoping to share in case you too ever struggle with the sin of coveting your neighbor. To covet means to desire or have a need for what others have. Call it jealousy or envy. In my selfish and self-entitled ways I sometimes see what others have and wonder why I too don't have those things. I work for a fortune 500 company and have been here 11 years. I have been at the bottom of the barrel my entire time. I was faced with an evil and sociopathic boss for those years. God answered my prayers and she is no longer in power. Many times while here I see people move up and make an excellent living. I mean, these people are buying houses, BMW's, boats, trips, etc and meanwhile I am here trying to not stress about how I am going to pay my daycare bill or rent. God miraculously provides every month but that is not to say that there is some worry sometimes. I want those things though and I think it is natural. I want to own the big house, I want that car for my husband, I want my kids in Christian private school, I want to go on that family vacation, I want, I want, I want. I feel like I have hit a wall and I need a breakthough! A big breakthrough for my family! So the other day I was making my Christmas list for my children. All of a sudden I was filled with worries. I thought, Oh dear, my kids are going to be jealous of eachother. No matter how hard I try whether it is getting them the same amount of presents or spending the same dollar amount they always are hurt or dissapointed because their sibling got what they rather have. Last year, I bought my daughter a Coach purse and my son a cheap tablet that I might add only lasted 2 weeks. My daughter was filled with envy and so sad that she did not get that tablet. I was crushed. As I was in the store picking out that Coach purse that I thought was perfect, I never once thought how unhappy she would be. I was crushed. So this year while making the list and reliving last year, God whispered that is how it is for him. When he blesses us with something yet WE in our flesh want MORE MORE MORE. Sometimes we need to take a step back and be thankful! All good things come with time. Sometimes we are not ready for things and sometimes what God has for us he has for no one else. We need to simply delight in the Lord. So my challenge is to replace my coveting thoughts with praises instead for what I do have! To God be the glory! Besitos, Lisa